DR. AUX’S MAGICAL, CURE-ALL JET LAG ELIXER

People always ask me, How do you combat Jet Lag?

Well, there are no easy answers, and no real sure-fire remedies.  But over the decades I HAVE come up with what works best for me, and is standard advice I give everyone.  It’s simple, easy, and if you follow it, will cut your jet-laggishness by gobs:

1.) Sleep as much as you can, When you can.

2.) Wherever you are, THAT’S what time it is!

Th-th-that’s all, folks!!!

Embellishment:

1.) Tired on the plane?  Cat-nap.  Exhausted when you arrive? Snooze!  Can’t keep your eyes open at din-din?  Fall asleep in your pasta bowl.  DON’T “plan ahead” and try to “manage” your sleep!  For example, don’t force yourself to stay up on the plane ride till local bedtime, when you can hardly keep your eyes open.  ‘Cause, what if local sleepy time comes around and NOW you got your second wind?!  Now you CAN’T sleep, when you need to!  And that first day doing Vienna’s "Sound of Music" Tour's shot.

The more you sleep, the quicker you’ll adjust to local time!

Conversely, if you pop up wide awake at 3am, there’s no sense in tossing and turning for the next three hours.  Go take a serene walk  around the Eiffel Tower!  There’s something sublimely serendipitous about being awake and experiencing the magic of life in a strange corner of the planet when the rest of the world is asleep around you!

2.)  Set your wristwatch to LOCAL time, and FORGET about the time at home!!!  I can’t stress this enough.   Psychologically, you are curious about the time at home, and your body wants to adhere to that schedule, which is completely irrelevant and temporarily obsolete!

When in Rome, do when the Romans do!

 Yes, these two rules can conflict, so Rule 2 is subordinate to Rule 1.  Just do this to the best of your ability!

As for pre-planning, if you have the flexibility and the fortitude, getting to bed an hour earlier each night for a few nights (9pm, then 8pm, then 7pm...) for a trip Eastbound (conversely 1hr/day later Westbound) might help...but it's a lotta work and tough to schedule.  Good luck with dat!

For me, Part of the joys of world travel is getting COMPLETELY lost and disoriented in a new corner of the world--language, locale, time...I lose even my own identity, become that feather on the wind in “Forest Gump”; it's an amazingly liberating and psychologically freeing experience to Let Go of ALL structure in your life!  You’ll find that that very same structure is its own gilded cage, and you have the POWER to cast it off at will!!

And you’ll come home, refreshed, with a whole new attitude and appreciation for your life!  Just make sure you schedule a couple of days to "recover" from your "R&R!"

Oh, yeah, you can do this stuff, too.  Except for the avoiding naps thing.  Du -umb!

A side note on sleep aids.  Just about everything I've tried SUCKS!  Most drugs just give me crappy sleep and I awake groggy and more fatigued than when I went to bed.  But, two things that seem to do it best for me are 1.) ignatia amara, a homeopathic remedy that allows you to relax rather than force you to sleep (thanks, Lisa, for this one!) and 2.) nothing beats a simple Tylenol PM!  Melatonin seems to work for many, though for me it's a bit "hit and miss."  (Ideally, take 3 hrs. before local bed time...)

If, at bedtime, you're not feeling it, try one of the above sleep aids.   It's all one big experiment when it comes to your own body and world travel...

And that's part of the big adventure--self-discovery--ain't it?!

Oh, and PS: The best travel tip I ever received came from my dad.  He was not a pilot, not a real world traveler (though he served on a Destroyer in the Pacific in WWII.)  He said,  "When you plan a trip, first lay out on your bed everything you want to take.  Then, put away half the clothes and take twice the money."

I've never gone wrong taking that advice!

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PS:  Today some of you may have seen references to "Kony 2012."  Check this out!:

http://www.kony2012.com/

INTERLUDE: The Most Amazing Places You (and I) Have Never Heard of

Photo courtesy of (i.e., stolen from) Jacob and Sanna's Blog,
http://jacobandsanna.blogspot.com/2012/01/off-to-thailand.html

Strange how the world got so small

I turned around and there was nowhere left to go.

So sad, the dream always dies

Each new arrival closes places in my mind.

But I can dream 

until I go

Of smells that I don't recognize

And by the river in Shanghai

The colour of the sky 

is something I've never seen.

After the summer rain 

children smile

Curious and kind 

and the world is big again.

—JOE JACKSON, “SHANGHAI SKY”, BIG WORLD

Wow.

I really thought myself a worldwise, savvy traveller.  

But this site is chalk full of spectacular places I’ve never heard of, let alone experienced!

I thought my bucket list was nearly full...but now I see I've only just begun!

And the World is Big again...

Check out:

THE COOLHUNTER

Flushing the Toity at 39,000’, and Other Busted Myths

A childhood friend of mine once asked me, “I’ve been dying to know all my life:  when you flush the toilet on an airplane, does it just dump out all over the ground?”

Well, I’m happy to say, that question has finally been answered definitively, by an unfortunate couple lounging on their back deck.  Yep, the brown sludge that fell from the sky and covered their evening in smelly brown goo was . . . indeed . . . lav doo too!*

Don't worry, it hasn't come to this on airplanes...yet!!

Actually, and quite fortunately, that was a complete fluke.  The reality is, all waste generated on an airplane is supposed to flush into a holding tank, similar to the head on a Winnebago or sailboat.  And, while the latter vessel can choose to feed the fish at any given moment, strict EPA and FAA rules require that aircraft only be emptied on the ground, in a completely controlled environment.  Hence the “Blue Juice truck” servicing your aircraft prior to departure, and the poor schmuck who has to run it.  For, despite the closely controlled system . . .  hazmat happens.

Why not a full hazmat suit?!  You couldn't pay me enough...

Reminds me of the guy who’s job was to empty the airplane lavatory.  Every night he came home reeking of sewage and griping to his wife.  “Well, why don’t you quit?” asks his supportive spouse.  “What?!” the doo doo dumper gasps, “and leave aviation?!”

A joke only us flying nuts would get, I suppose.

I'll be in my office!  Anybody seen my copy of War and Peace?! (Fifi's Lav A) 

At the risk of TMI, a little more about blue juice.  Other than the obvious reason that none of us appreciate getting shat upon by Jonathan Livingston Seagull—the bird or plane version—there are other factors forbidding flushing at altitude.

Cartoon proudly stolen from Chris Mano (Jethead's blog: http://jethead.wordpress.com/)

First of all, temperatures at cruise tend to be in the minus-a-lots.  And, like anything liquid, blue juice freezes.  Clogs the pipes.  Jacks the system.  A leaky lav drain can freeze into icy blue chunks beneath the fuselage, which then break off in the airstream.  Yes, earthbound real estate has fallen victim to hurtling blue projectiles falling from the sky, though no peeps injured or killed that we know about.**

WTF?!  Eh...no comment!

Secondly, any metal bird flying above 10,000 (besides the most basic Cessna) will be pressurized.  Air flows in, air flows out, but at an extremely controlled rate.  The onboard air conditioners work overtime keeping the cabin air pumped up to breathable levels, sort of like flying inside a balloon.  While being nearly airtight, however, an airplane is far from hermetically sealed.  Small leaks are standard, medium leaks get our attention, and a big leaks call for an emergency dive bomb while sucking on those margarine cup thingies dangling from the ceiling.

Which brings us to Myth #2:  Despite the wives tale perpetuated by the original “Airport” disaster movie, a tiny hole punched in the plane will not “suck” a human being out the window . . . or down the drain.  (Death by toilet sucking - yikes!)  Although you wouldn’t know it from the 6-year-old emerging from the lav, screaming and crying, traumatized by the chainsaw-decibel toilet flush at 35,000’.

Warp Speed, Number One.  Engage!  Er...better make that Number 2!

Perhaps that's what Gerard Depardieu was worried about when he chose not to use the lav.***
Airbus, you coulda done a better job making the flusher more husher!
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*Couple Wants Answers After Lav Leak

**There were at least 27 documented incidents of blue ice impacts in the United States between 1979 and 2003

***French actor Gerard Depardieu urinates on an airplane